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May 08, 2007
Spider-Man3 is Teh Suck and other news
So yeah, I'm not a big fan of the new Spider-Man movie. My only real problem with it is how much it sucks. Which is not to say it's an awful movie. It's not. It's a really mediocre movie. Well, maybe slightly sub-mediocre. Visually there's some great stuff in here. There are some fun moments. Sitting in a theater FULL of people over the weekend I was only bored once or twice (usually when Aunt May was giving basic, boring relationship advice to Peter Parker). But for the most expensive movie ever, this thing is a mess.
The problems start, and maybe even end, with the script. All the actors do a fine enough job. The effects are on par with the other films. Venom looks cool. Sandman looks cool. The black spidey suit looks...ok. But the story itself is just one lazy decision piled on top of another. I imagine the writers and director cared about something as they made this movie, but it wasn't telling a convincing, good story. There are fine moments (and some groaners), but it doesn't hang together at all. It relies entirely on coincidence and misunderstanding for almost every plot point. The Venom goop just happens to fall from space next to Peter Parker and jumps onto his scooter. No explanation. No reason it's attracted to Peter. Nothing. I mean, nothing. Not even a tiny throw-away line giving some possible explanation. The Sandman is running from the cops and just happens to fall into this science project thing and he gets turned into this insanely powerful villain. Harry Osbourne hits his head and forgets all the reasons he's a bad guy. Amnesia! You've got to be kidding me! The laziest trope known to writing. Except maybe putting the love interest in jeopardy at the end, but they do that too. And Eddie happens to be in the same church so Venom can fall on him. He goes to investigate the ringing bells, but none of the priests - who we JUST saw - bother to check it out? And butler guy coming out of nowhere? And the super powered out of control crane that cuts through skyscrapers like a knife through hot butter?
Posted by rdakan at May 8, 2007 10:21 AM